Terry Cox Obituary
Terry Lee Cox, a former Santa Rosa rugby player, died on Saturday, October 15th, after suffering a stroke on October 7, 2022. He was 68.
Terry was born in March of 1954 to Raymond and Viola Cox in Bakersfield, CA. He is preceded in death by his older sister Linda. His parents moved from Bakersfield to Cloverdale when Terry was a young boy, and they later moved to Santa Rosa.
After graduating from Santa Rosa High School in 1972, Terry eventually studied real estate at Santa Rosa Junior College. After gaining his California Real Estate License, he landed his first loan officer job for Home Savings of America, kicking off a 30-year career in mortgage banking.
In 1989, Terry met Catherine Hughes in a popular bar on Fourth Street in Santa Rosa, where Terry was out celebrating with the Santa Rosa Rugby Club. They wed in 1990, going on to have Terry’s beloved son, Brian Cox. Even though Terry and Catherine divorced in 1998, they remained best friends until his death, deeply dedicated to raising Brian together, often working at the same mortgage companies.
Terry’s life was devoted to his son, rugby, animals, and coaching young men. His favorite times were any time spent with his son, but especially at rugby games, where he’d check in with everyone he knew. He’d remind (nag) every young man he encountered to go to school or get some type of formal job training. He wanted them all to be successful and happy.
Terry’s love of animals is legendary, and he always sought to rescue one or several. His favorite dog of all time is Brian’s dog Roxy, and his favorite cat was Shadow, “the black beast,” as he liked to call her. He was falling in love with his most recent cat rescue, Stella, and was still looking at all of the dogs in the shelters wishing for property large enough to take them all in on the day of the stroke.
In his retirement years, Terry enjoyed working part-time in the Sonoma County wine industry and meeting people worldwide, who were still contacting him until his death. He had an amazing way with people and said he had never met a stranger. Going to the grocery store for one item was an hour-long experience because he had to talk to everyone.
His terrible dancing and absolutely wicked sense of humor will be deeply missed. His favorite events were get-togethers with friends and fellow ruggers Ron Norman and Dave Ellis over a beer (or many) in a local bar and making everyone laugh until their sides ached. His favorite band was the Eagles, but he also loved Neil Diamond, Nora Jones, and jazz. He also enjoyed attending the Santa Rosa Symphony.
Studying history was his favorite hobby, and he could spend hours in a museum. He would have made a great high school history teacher. Travel was his other passion–his favorite places were any place tropical. Tan with a beer and a pool or warm ocean water was his happy place.
Terry is predeceased by his parents and his sister, Linda. He is survived by his son Brian, niece Lisa, aunts and uncles, and many cousins.
Terry was an organ donor, so there will not be any funeral services. A Celebration of Life event will be held later as we form ideas about what that should look like. He loved a good party with family and friends. He will be missed.
I loved the time I had with Terry, because of him and Bob I got to play Rugby. Terry gave me a pride I still hold on to today. Love you Coach I’ll never forget you.
Sleep well coach, please keep me informed on the life celebration, i’ll gather up the fijian boys he coached, to come and celebrate a great man!
I am sorry to hear of the passing of Terry. Terry was really kind to me especially every time I saw him. He would go out of the way to talk to me and help me with anything, and an amazing mentor not only in life but in the game of rugby as well. He will truly be missed. My condolences to you and your family and my good teammate Brian.
Things were so sketchy for me n my kids when I met you.. yet you and Cath welcomed us to your family no questions asked. We didn’t talk much… random comments on Facebook… yet I knew you were taking care of my friend. I’m so sorry to hear of your passing…. to hear the anguish in Catherines updates on face book. I hope you are at peace.. playing rugby.. that the weather is perfect…. that all the people and animals you loved greeted you…and you now fully realize what an impact what a difference you have made. Fly high Terry!
Thank you Terry for the tough love you gave me growing up. Thank you for your laughs and moments of deep introspection and reflection. See you on the pitch, Terry.
May your sense of humor be a blessing in Heaven. It was my pleasure to work with you at Kendall Jackson. RIP my friend.
I went to Monte Vista Christian High School with Terri. He was always smiling. I remember his humor and kindness. We’ve texted a few times over the years. He will be missed.
Sorry to hear of Terry’s passing. I saw him 3 weeks ago in the grocery store. One of these encounters with Terry where he was taking up rugby. I Always had great conversations with Terry whenever we ran into each other.
Rest in peace Terry.
Terry was good friend; I worked with Ray & Terry at Ray’s Texaco 1968. Ray & Viola Terry’s parents were the two nicest people I ever met in Cloverdale. Hot summer days we would have the biggest water fight you ever saw at work. I’m sure Kay saw us out there she lived next door. In 1970 we were both sophomores CHS. Terry was always helping me. He took my 350 Honda down to the first street bridge and race John Gundeson across, came back told me Mike John’s Yamaha beat your bike bad. Sometime after that Terry moves to Arkansas. I went saw him and his parents there. My grandparents live back there. At the end of the 70’s I went to his Rugby match in Tahoe. It looks cool like a bunch of Irish-English guy’s jump in a pile to hit a ball. I think we Rugby our way to Steve wedding too. After that we both were full time worker bees. We didn’t see each other much after that. A few times too caught up.
Terry came by to visit in June. He told me about still working at winery, we talked about history & genealogy. He looked good, he talks about Brian’s Rugby and I talked about Josh my son working in a winery proud Dad’s. This was the last time I would see Terry. Rest in peace my friend until we meet again
I’m sorry to hear of Terry’s passing, but I’m glad he was with family. He was my uncle. I have fond memories of him growing up. My condolences to Cathi and Brian. Brian is so young to lose his dad. May Terry rest in peace with his parents and his sister, my mom in Heaven.
There really is no way words can describe what Terry and I shared over the years. Most certainly we were best of friends for decades. We were rookies together on the Santa Rosa Rugby Club. He help us build our family horse ranch. He was family.
There were stretches of time as life moves on and we pursued careers and family where we didn’t comminicate much, but at any event or catch up meet, it was as if we had hung out yesterday. We recently had started many dialogues about the rugby club and how to help it thrive for the bext 50 years.
Terry, I am truly gonna miss you but know when we reconvene you will have some new jokes, a great rugby techniques, and that smile and laugh that made you one of the best buds ever.
Like so many others, I met Terry through rugby. I was lucky enough to be able to call him a teammate, coach, and friend. He was mischievously witty, while at the same time always genuinely caring and thoughtful. After moving from Santa Rosa, I didn’t see Terry that often, but any time I did it was as if no time had passed at all. He would ask about how my family was doing and fill me in on Brian’s exploits and how the particular team he was coaching was faring at the time. Terry taught me a lot about being a better player and person, I will always be grateful for the time and wisdom he gave so generously.
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